Life is never easy for those who dream

Under the boundless soothing sky
My eyes reach for the edge of the world and still
Wet grass, old leaves, blush cheeks, wild tangled hairs
Watching the day slipped away slowly in perfect rhythm
Have you ever been told, being alone is better than been lonely?
In cities no one is quiet but many souls are sad
Where I am, people are quiet but their hearts are full
The heart; the only broken instrument that work
I am not going to think that this world is only cold
If you want to come to my humble home
I have a rocking chair that have been known to bear heavy load
I am prepared to listen if you can speak in silence
Up here the sky is green and all you care is in between
Come this way, come with me let's get undone
Deep in my dream, deep in a dream
That's where you will find me; I hope you will find you

"The highest task for a bond between two people
Each protects the solitude of the other"

I am done with love but love is not done with me

If I let this little voice goes away, if I don’t tell you how I feel, if I just live half a life, if and if and if…

Give and take;
How can I make this delicate balance a stable in my life?
The overwhelming feeling of being alone
in a relationship, misunderstood
I dream of you; someone with bigger hands,
bigger feet, bigger heart
to embrace my little hands, feet, and heart.
And in return
I give back my heart , my soul,
endless devotion and love.
When I look up to you, on my tiptoes looking for a kiss
When I hug you, squeeze you tight with my skinny arms
When I curl up, trying to mold to you in bed for warm
When I look deep into your eyes looking for the ocean of love
that I know exist;
looking for the depth of your soul
where love is profound and deep and true.
Can you feel it?
My need to look up, to respect, to regard,
to give, to rely on you when I am happy, sad, weary, strong… I need you.

Doubt

The Zen way ~
Great Doubt, Great Awakening
Little Doubt, Little Awakening
No Doubt, No Awakening

Doubt is a part of my making
It is the way of how I see things
Steps I take, moves I make
The evidence of my illusions
The more I learn, less I know
School of life, the day I die I graduate


Who is happier, those who are aware, and doubt, or those who are sure of what they believe in, and have never doubted or questioned? The answer was that this has nothing to do with happiness. Happiness came upon you like the weather determined by your own personality.

Soul Mate

In thousand paths
And thousands of people
What is the chance that we will meet
Eyes to eyes
Soul to soul
What is the chance that we will walk
Side by side on the street of Lovers lane
Are you the thousand winds that blow
Are you the soft lifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight
I look at the soft star and wish
You are the morning light
You are the thousand kisses
You are the gentle touches
You are there in the morning hush

To be loved

He asked me

Do you love me more than you love yourself?

I responded

I die for me but I live for you

I draw each breath for me

But my heart beats for you

In loving you

I drop all that I know

My past, my pain, my lost, my gain

I drop my everything

In loving you

I have become a scholar

I find stars are just holes to heaven

I find dreams are just gate to our souls

I find love is my divine right

To feel, to touch, to cry, to try

I find new me

I find new you

I love you

I love myself

The Beginning

Step by step www.silentthought.net
The world outside of my window...
The Paris's sky
The mind of Rodin
The beauty of art
The beating of my heart
The passion shared by so many souls
The beginning or is it the end
The endless cycle of death and rebirth
If not for the arts that left behind
for thousands to witness
Thousands of heartbeat
Or thousands of heart; skip a beat!
The silent notes in between

Radiate Happiness

L'homme propose, Dieu dispose

I believe that it is better to be divided by truth than united in deceit

When love is great, there is no need for words. For even in silence, love is heard

I see the moon
The slivers of light leak through the branches
into my soul awaken past hidden memories
Dancing leaves, soft wind singing the song of sweet longing
Caress my hair
The long strands divulge the memory of being touched by you
Breathless I close my eyes and wonder
If you happen to look up the sky, and see the moon
The reflection of passion, the relentless search for your own soul mate

Today is all I have

The talk and dance of self

Still the mind so my eyes can open
Still the tongue so my heart can fly
Still the sounds, music, sights, and words
Lift the veil of illusions so I can see real life
The more things are changing the more they
stay the same, I keep running but the road
leads to the same place I came, Life keeps changing
but the core of “I” doesn’t change; part living, part dying
Marching to my train stop; racing to somewhere
where am I racing to?
My mortal life; It's just a flare
News of another soul passed away to a far away place
News of another birth, an innocent soul enters earth to stay
News I woke up this morning and wanting to live
Today is all I have and all I have is today

Tribute to my friend John and his fight against cancer. His words “If I get to do it again, V! I would choose love and life. I will work less, worry less and laugh more. Now every laugh harbors chest pain and tears but I will not stop laughing. Take care of yourself and don’t wait to be happy because life waits for no one!”

Butterflies

We all want to fly but when and at what price
The caterpillar doesn't want to die
It is beautiful and wonder in its own way
I am once a caterpillar and still a caterpillar
My wings are strong but not yet dry
Attachment, delusions make the web of my cocoon
When and how I can learn to fly
To be free and become one with the open sky

As I write this, I am sitting at my large desk in the corner of the room that I use to create my art, paintings in both acrylic and oil, mixed media, in fact anything that I can lay my hands on. Except, aside from the space that I have cleared for my laptop and an even smaller space for my tea, there is no space in this room. This room over the past few weeks has become the dumping ground for 'things' as I have made my way through the house organizing, sorting, and generally re-designing my life through my surroundings.
I sit here, full of hope, new paths laid out before me, I am surrounded by choices and I continue to make what appears to be the right choice each and every time I see a crossroads before me. The desk at this moment complete and utter chaos, yet every other room in the house is clean, re-designed, organized and feels like the future I see before me, so I have in essence begun to create in the present moment the dream of my future. This desk though, represents the part of me that can overwhelm some people, it overwhelms me too, but not for long and not very often, but sometimes, everything piles upon my shoulders and weighs me down in the most crippling of ways. Fear.

The smell of fear... I have lived through it all. Growing up without my parents since I was thirteen; I understand the depth of humility and the pain of struggling alone in this world. I sailed through life with little means but committed to finding happiness in every little thing, finding happiness when there would appear none. For year I have been confused as to who I was but now, I know who I am, I have a strong idea of who I want to be and who I am becoming. And the fear, childhood fear, I went home to my mother to make peace with my pain, my past, my heart. I got my share of love and hugs that I grew up without. I cried my tears. I forgave myself for resenting my parents for sending me so faraway. I forgave my mother for sending me so far away. I held her wrinkled face with my hands and kissed her all over. She looked in my eyes and said "Oh how much you have grown and make me proud". She stroked my hair for hours on the day I planned to fly back to the states. I was on my knees crying quietly in her lap. The physical separation was painful for both of us. As I write this, tears are streaming down my face but my heart is full with love. My mother is right here inside my heart. I am complete, completely as peace with life and with love. Now that it is out there, it is not so bad, as it felt inside of me all alone.

As for this room I will finish writing this and drink the last of my tea. I will redesign my space to reflect my soul, the true me, 100% authentically me.